Purple Pantaloon Irises
by Nancy Medina
Oil on Panel
Besides learning that a room full of southern gals makes up a really fun painting workshop, I learned another very important lesson last weekend during my trip to Tennessee. Do NOT under any circumstances, even if they are really, really cute, wear your fancy jeans with glitter pockets through DFW International Airport security. Turns out those full body scanners that leave nothing to the imagination could not properly scan my nether regions because I had on my new uber cute sparkley jeans.
Because it was rush hour in the security line, I was about 14 inches face to face with the grinning gentleman behind me while the polite but efficient female agent gave me some fanny pats and sent me on my way. Someone smart explained to me the next day that these machines cannot see through the metallic flakes in the glitter on fancy clothing. Well so much for wearing all my future sequined Vegas T shirts through the airport!
Fortunately there were no sirens that went off, or flashing lights "(All agents stat to line three for the elderly woman in sparkley britches....)...." It was only slightly more embarrassing than getting kicked out of the flower show on Coronado Island, though, come to think of it, the lady in the green apron did not want to pat me down before ordering me to exit the rose judging area without delay.
Here is the conversation that occurred later that evening around the NTSA agent's dinner table:
So hon, anything interesting happen at work today?
Well, other than the 50 year old lady in 20 year old glitter pants, not much...
My irises wearing their fancy britches...